2000 Years of Pain
by The-Voice-In-Your-Pants
Summary: Naruto and Sasuke make it to the final round of there second chuunin exam and Naruto uses the most unusual technique to beat him.
1. 2000 years of pain

Disclaimer: All I own is the Konohagakure Inzen Taijutsu Ougi: Nisennen Goroshi (Hidden Leaf Ancient Taijutsu Supreme Technique: 2000 Years of Pain) and thats all.

**2000 years of pain **

Naruto smirked as he walked out onto the large stone stadium where his second chuunin exam was held. As he made his way to the center of the stadium he heard the crowd scream " U-Chi-Ha" as Sasuke walked in from the other side of the stadium, Naruto also picked out a few voices yelling "Kill the demon." and "Make it suffer."

A tiny voice in the back of his mind whispered "I wander what they'll think when you beat him with your new technique."

As Genma yelled begin Naruto already jumped back already starting his technique, finishing the hand seals he had mastered long before Naruto yelled "Kage Bunshin No Jutsu."

The now five Narutos surrounded Sasuke, who was just now crouching into a Taijutsu stance, Sasuke watched as the naruto's pulled there hands back, rasengan started to form in each of there hands, when finished, the Naruto's charged the Uchiha, Sasuke spun caching one of the naruto's in the face making it explode in a puff of smoke. Quickly facing the next closest Naruto catching its hand centimeters before it hit his face, blinded by the rasengan's light sasuke didn't see the kunai that sliced threw the smoke left by the kage bunshin and in-bed itself in his right arm.

By this time the other naruto's had arrived, one prepared to let loose its resengan on sasuke's remaining good arm but the swirling ball of chakra didn't do anything it just dissipated on contact with the sharingan users arm, the kage bunshin grabbed his arm, the Naruto that Sasuke had grabbed had by this time grabbed his other already injured arm. The remaining two Naruto's stood on front of Sasuke, the one on the left moved forward pulling two kunai from his pouch, It crouched and stabbed the kunai into Sasuke's feet, effectively immobilized the other naruto almost skipped up to the Uchiha.

Naruto let out a laugh, but it didn't sound crazed or merciless it sounded happy, Sasuke closed his eye's, when he opened them the Sharingan had activated ready to copy any technique Naruto would use.

Ox, Ram,Horse,Tiger, Naruto ended the stream of hand seals ending on tiger, Naruto's hand's flared in chakra , Naruto concentrated making the chakra around his hands visible, Pulling make his hand's naruto advanced on the struggling Sasuke.

"Konohagakure Inzen Taijutsu Ougi: Nisennen Goroshi (Hidden Leaf Ancient Taijutsu Supreme Technique: 2000 Years of Pain).

In The Stands

After hearing Naruto call out his attack Kakashi started slamming his head into the wall, "Dosent..he..get...that..I...made...up...that...move." Kakashi said while slamming his head into the wall in between each word.

Back To the Match

Naruto was now a foot away from Sasuke, he thrusted his arm's forward grabbing Sasuke's nipples between his index and middle finger's, and started to twist.

The sharingan user creamed in pain as he try-ed to pull away Naruto, but Naruto had an iron grip on his nipples and wouldn't let go.

"AHHHHH!!!!," Sasuke screamed " I GIVE UP JUST LET ME THE FUCK GO."

Naruto dropped his hands to his side, a smile played on his face that threatened to split it in two, he had did it , defeated the mighty Sasuke.

A/N: Hello every on, this is actually my first fic so go easy on me plz. Also sorry about the spelling mistakes I had to wright this in word-pad cause my Microsoft Word isn't working for some dumb reason.

And I was wondering if anyone that reads this could point me in the direction of some Naruto fanfics where Naruto runs away from Konoha and comes back a demi-god/demon please and thank you, and if you email it make sure you put something BOLD in front of it.

And Always Make Sure You Listen To

The-Voice-In-Your-Pants


	2. the second unbeatable move

2000 years of pain: part 2

Disclaimer: I only own the greatest Naruto move ever the "2000 YEARS OF PAIN".

PART 2.

The crowd sat silent and still watching Naruto dance happily in the center of the arena, inner Sakura was mad, no she was furious.

"How could he defeat my Sasuke-kun with such a dumb move," her inner self screamed. "Ill get him for this the next time I see him!!!"

The Next Day

Naruto strutted down the street feeling so good he could just feel the pounds adding onto his weight, the best part was he came up with another technique last night before he want to bed, he couldn't wait to us it on Sasuke the next time he had a fight with the dambdeble Uchiha, coming to a stop at the bridge team seven usually meet at..

With Sasuke

Sasuke sat on the edge of a horribly white bed in room 105 of the hospitals recovery ward, he could still feel the effects of the 2000 years of pain naruto had inflicted on him, he just had 1999 years and 363 days left before the technique lived up to its name.

"How the hell did that dobe beat me with that...that...what ever the hell you call that." He muttered under his breath.

just then Sakura burst into the room gushing out obscenities, he blocked most of them out, but he couldn't miss the last one she spoke.

"Let me see Sasuke-kun" she said already beginning to lift up his shirt, now this freaked him out, he didn't want Sakura looking at his horribly beet red nipples, so he did what any man would do, he ran, he ran as fast as his legs could carry him, out the door leaping over old women in wheel chairs and nurses with trays of sharp objects, not even noticing the bright green, paper clothing he was wearing, leaving the nurse and old women with a nice view of his butt.

When Sasuke stopped running he was near the bridge 'his' team usually meet at, he was to busy brooding over what would be the best way to start castrating Naruto with fishing knives would saw the object of his hatred.

"look at him," the Uchiha thought. " that smug little bastard, ill get him."

Narutos Point Of View

Naruto sat leaning his back against a tree when he heard heavy foot steps, turning his head he saw his rival tearing at him in bright green paper, he almost died right there trying to hold in his laughter, he managed to control himself as he quickly rose from the ground.

Sasuke reached for a kunai when he realized what he was wearing, he faltered and almost tripped when Naruto grabbed the sleeve of his now healed arm, Sasuke pulled away and the sleeve of the paper clothing easily ripped at the shoulder.

"Perfect," Naruto thought "I can do the technique I made up last night."

Just as Naruto thought that, Sasuke heard a howling laugh to his right, it was Kakashi, all of a sudden two Naruto's popped out of nowhere and pinned him to the ground spread eagle, Naruto leaned near Sasuke completing the seals for the 2000 years of pain, chakra glowed from his fingers, Sasuke closed his eye waiting for the pain, but it did not come were expected.

END... nah

The pain exploded in his arm pit, naruto was pulling out his arm pit hair one by one.

'WHATS WRONG WITH YOU!!!!!" Sasuke screamed, as he started to writhe and try to free himself.

When Naruto plucked the eighth or so pit hair Sasuke almost couldn't take it any more.

" Say uncle and it will stop" Naruto said, already leaning in to grab another pit hair, when Naruto's answer didn't come he just shrugged and leaned in again.

"UNCLE ,UNCLE, FOR THE LOVE OF KAMI UNCLE!!!!!!!" Sasuke screamed when naruto didn't grab one hair but a clump and started pulling.

And once again Naruto defeats Sasuke with his seemingly unbeatable technique's

A/N: well there it is the second installment of the "2000 years of pain" series, what once was a mid night idea has turned into a series that has and will touch the hearts of many.... well at least 30 ppl I hope and to all the Sasuke fans out there if I get enough reviews calling for him to actually win one, then ill think about it.

Well I'm tired and just Had football tryouts so I'm going to bed.

But Always Make Sure You Listen To

The-Voice-In-Your-Pants


	3. getting air

Disclaimer: I still own nothing

part 3

Naruto found himself sitting at his favorite ramen stand bragging to Iruka about his latest win over Sasuke.

"... And...then...I...made...him...say....uncle." Naruto said excitedly to Iruka while taking a slurps of his thirteenth bowl of ramen.

" Well thats good and all Naruto, but have you ever beaten Sasuke without using you 'special moves'." Iruka answered snickering the last few words. Iruka started to feel bad when Naruto's bottom lip started to tremble.

"It was the greatest moment in my life and you just had to take that away from me, didn't you." Naruto sputtered as tears began to fall from his eye. Iruka started to apologize, when Naruto ran out on to the street. Thats when Iruka noticed he was left with the bill.

" Damn kid, he's going to have to pay one of these times." he chuunin muttered to himself.

10 With Naruto 01

Jogging down the street Naruto laughed out loud, he had fooled Iruka into paying again. Naruto was contemplating his next move to use on Sasuke when he heard his named being called.

"NARUTO-KUN WAIT UP." the female voice called, when Naruto turned he saw Sakura.

"What the hell, shes' never called me Naruto-kun" he thought as Sukura caught up with him. but something was wrong she had a smirk on her face, not a I-Now-Something-You-Don't smirk a Your-Gonna-Get-It smirk, now he was scared, but just as he turned to run an exploding pain erupted from between his legs, tears spilled from his eye's as he rose into the air a few feet.

"That was for Sasuke-kun" she said very pleased with herself while Naruto landed in a heap a few feet from her.

10 A Few Hours Later 01

After Naruto managed to crawl to his apartment he collapsed onto his apartment, just laying there on the welcome mat, after resting there for an hour or two Naruto got up and walked bo-legged to his refrigerator, grabbing an ice pack he once again collapsed onto his bed holding the ice to his package, he last thoughts before drifting of to sleep were 'I hope I don't have an inner.'

Naruto woke up to some very loud birds chirping at his window, he attempted to get up but a pain shot threw his body. Apparently the damage Sakura had inflicted on him could not be healed by even by the kyuubi in just one night, as Naruto layed back down he heard his apartment door open.

When Kakashi entered Naruto's room he saw a most pitiful sight, shaking his head he coughed to get the kids attention, the jounin winced when Naruto turned to face him, Narutos face was pail and he was curled into a fetal position.

"H...hel...hello... Kakashi-sensei" Naruto stuttered out.

"Hey Naruto, I heard what happened, but this might be a lesson to you..." Kakashi said both pain and cheerfulness in his voice.

"...And what kind of lesson would that be?" Naruto asked.

10101010100101010100101010

sry for the short chapter and long wait but i just went threw the first week of grade 10 and it took a while to get used to, and with football and such.... well anyway i wanted to wright more but I need more time to come up with dumb moves for Naruto to beat Sasuke or someone else with.

cya


	4. authors note and reveiw answers

OK I have almost no idea where this story will go, so it would help if anyone told me where they would like it to go like if I should sort of turn it action adventure or stick with the mindless story writing or if you want romance or Naruto going crazy and killing every one who pissed him off as a child, I kind of have an idea where i want this to go, but only a general direction.

and now something I thought id never do.

**Yuen-chan**

**I'm glad you thought the attacks were weird thats exactly what I was going for.**

**Hyourin Kage**

**thank god you didn't choke on your nerds again I don't think I could take you dying while reading my fic and to the Grammar mistakes the ultimate evil! comment I'm sorry to say that everyone will have to live with the ultimate evil unless I get a beta reader or something to that extent.**

**SoraOokami**

**To answer you question no they don't charge anything for these accounts, well I don't know if they changed it but 3 years ago when I signed up it was free.**

**EvilCloud**

**I'm oh so happy you like it.**

**Ly**

**OK then ill just have to have Sasuke get his ass beat again :)**

**Magy**

**I don't know if ill torment anyone else... maybe Kiba, I just hate his character in the show.**

**phantomgamer01**

**Well this is your chance to tell me where you want it to go.**

**and last but not leat... well my first reviewer**

**Metalicgal**

**I bestow upon you the powers of the 2000 years of pain but use it wisely just make sure you don't pull to hard :)**


	5. chap 5

Naruto stepped out from under the shade of the massive gate's that protected the west most part of the city, trudging down the wide road that lead to the wind country.

"Stupid c rank mission, I don't want to go to the wind country, ambassador my ass," Naruto mumbled as he heaved a sigh ",well I best be off."

Leaping to the top of a tall tree Naruto began leaping to wards the wind countries border

A small village an hour east of the wind country border

"hmmm, I've never heard of 'Za Azuma Enkai Shiti'... well how bad can it be" (AN/ "za azuma enkai shiti" means "The East Ocean City" I was going for Atlantic City)

A creaking sound meet Naruto''s ears as he stepped onto the rotting boardwalk, wincing as he took another few steps,

"Hey kid," A deep voice sounded next to his ear, Naruto quickly whipped around to find a man struggling to stay on his feet. " could...hic...you spar some...hic... yen...to a...hic.... guy down on his...hic.....luck?"

" No way old man," The blond yelled. "hey...you look kind of familiar?" Naruto asked.

" No I don't kid, Ive never seen you in my life." The man said trying to stumble away.

" Holy shit...It can't be," Naruto said to himself " HEY ERO-SENNIN!!"

"DON'T CALL ME THAT" the man yelled.

"Ha, it it you ero-sennin... but what are you doing here?" The kyubi container asked.

"Weeeeeeeeeeelllllll," The toad sennin seemed to get excited about explaining his favorite place. " It has a BROTHEL Naruto, a true to kami brothel and and you know what else it has?"

"No i don't, what could it be" Naruto answered in a bored sarcastic way.

" It has a CLOTHING OPTIONAL BEACH!" The mega pervert squealed.

"WHAT?"

"Yea, I haven't been there yet but the people in the casino," the sennin bragged " hey do you want to come with me?"

"well I'm not so su'."

"Of course you want to come."

"But I'm only thir'."

"Oh that don't matter."

"But.."

"Oh we'll have so much fun ..."

"But..."

"Ill get some new material for my next book."

"But...oh screw it, OK ero-sennin ill go with you" Naruto finished in a huff.

Naruto trudged behind the mega-pervert who was know prancing down the board walk singing as if he were in a karaoke bar .

"She's my cherry pie  
Put a smile on your face  
Ten miles wide  
Looks so good  
Bring a tear to your eye  
Sweet cherry pie  
Yeah sweet cherry pie  
Yeah."

"FOR THE LOVE OF KAMI SHUT IT" Screamed Naruto.

"You ungrateful whelp I was trying to lighten the mood." The sennin yelled back.

"Whatever I'm hungry , where can we get something to eat?" Naruto asked while caressing his stomach.

"Well theres that place I got that weird mushroom omlette..," The sennin ask himself. ", yea well go there."

2min after leaving the restaurant

Naruto sat on the boardwalk staring at his hands they seemed to be moving in and out of focus, starring at them for a few minute he suddenly burst out laughing and got the sudden urge to move around, getting up from his sitting position still laughing his face off he suddenly called out "HEY ERO-SENNIN LOOK I'M NEJI." and naruto began to spin and spin until he suddenly was stopped by a dark cloaked figure.

"You shouldn't be this careless naruto-kun" The figure uttered.

"IATCHI!!" Naruto yelled in fear,kicking naruto to the ground, Itachi tied a rope binding Naruto's hands and feet, and knocked him out.

Naruto awoke to the sound of crackling wood, he opened his eye's to find Jiraiya with his back to him, prodding him with his bound hands Naruto hoped Itachi had not killed him, the sennin awoke with a start.

" Ah I see you two are awake" A voice said from some where behind them, propping them both up onto there knee's.

"These will be your last moments" Itachi promised, Naruto quickly turned to his sensei.

"I love you sens..."

" I BEAT OFF TO YOUR SEXY NO JUTSU!!!" The ultra-pervert yelled interrupting Naruto.

"YOU WHAT!!," Naruto yelled back " I'M GOING TO KILL YOU!!"

10101010010010100101101001

well thats it for this chap, sorry for not updating for so long I just had a lot of chit going on


	6. chap 6

As Itachi was about to thrust the shimmering kunai into the now unconscious Jiraiya's skull everything became slow to Naruto as he wriggled out of his binds and ran at the exposed back of the akatsuki member.

"HHHHHHHHHHHIIIIIIIIIIIYYYYYYYYYYYYYAAAAAAAAA" Naruto yelled as he gripped some white exposed cloth poking out of the waist band of the sharingan users pants. With all his might Naruto leaped straight up into the air. A ripping sound filled the air as Naruto flipped around a large branch and attached the string of Itachi's underwear to the branch.

Landing on his feet Naruto turned to make sure Itachi didn't get out of his wedgie. Laughter and gagging sounds filled the air as Naruto collapsed holding his side's, Itachi was wearing a...a thong.

"STOP LAUGHING," Itachi screeched in an extremely high pitched voice.

"HAHAHAHHA wouldn't Sasuke love to see this HAHAHAH."

"BUT ITS NOT MY FAULT THERE SO COMFORTABLE." Itachi screamed as Naruto threw Jiraiya and put him over his shoulder and headed toward a hotel.

The next morning Naruto leaped out the window and headed toward the boarder.

10100101010100101

sorry its so short, ill probably have another short one tomorrow


End file.
